Solitary And Silent

I wonder if this is what is destined for me.Being left all alone in the end.Being cheated upon and lied to.Not being accepted for who I am. But what I definitely am not going to do is change myself for a bunch of people who cannot stay loyal to me.
Yes loyalty is what all of us want. And I have always had to struggle for a long long time to finally find real friends who are compatible with me as well I am comfortable with.
I still count myself lucky to have a few genuine people left in my depressed life. But i don't want to be a hindrance in their life. I don't want to whine and stay all upset in front of them because they are the only people who most definitely deserve the best of me, and I'm going to put in my every bit of strength to stay happy with them, for them.
Why cannot I have a few friends like the rest of those idiots in that God-awful place have.Why am I the only one who is always left out in the end. And why do I have to wait so much and put in so much of an effort to make friends. :((
I know I'm sounding like some cry-baby
But whatever you may think, I'm feeling a rush of emotions inside me and yet
"I've become so numb" 

Life-as we call it

Finally a sunday huh!
Well yesterday did turn out to be a bad day after all.With India losing the match,thanks to MS Dhoni for his terribly wrong decision of giving the bowling to Nehra instead of Bhajji! It really was a fix.
Also a nuclear radiation blasted off yesterday in Japan owing to the massive earthquake.Media estimates around 1600 deaths so far.The pictures shown in the newspapers send shivers till my spine :(
Also,two of my very good friends had a break up of their relationship yesterday!And it makes me feel really really sad because i was the cause of their friendship to bloom,and it was me who introduced them.Somehow, i feel responsible for the pain they are goin through! People should never come into your life just to walk away.(this implies to many around me as well).I have kind of lost trust in the words like commitments and promises.All this young college love is nothing but a load of illusions and fascinations.Once the attraction leaves,arguments and consequent heartbreaks come into picture.In a way,its good that they ended it.If two people don't have the courage to give a fight to save their relationship knowing that it has a rocky future,well its best they end it.Better late than never you see!If you can stand by your other half(i'm not sure which one is the better half),then you really don't deserve to be in that relation.
Anyway, as someone told me last night,"This is life.Happens".True.
Anyway,today is going to be a wonderful sunday i'm predicting.To start with i'm gonna meet di tonight :D :)).After her marriage!! AWESOME :)
So looking forward to that!
Have an awesome day people!
Take care
Love-Rina
(PS-I'm gonna go and have a late n long sunday bath after a long time :P)

About headaches and awful matches

What would happen when you attend the most boring lab,then sit for 2 hours in library,then attend a lecture you can make no head or tail of and then come home to see an "Awesome" match turn into an "Awful" one!!
Damn the Indian cricket players! Give me a break dudes!! Imagine 9 wickets in just around 30-35 runs? This match definitely seemed to be a fix!!Its such a waste of Sachin's marvelous 111!!
Something else I have been thinking about today is to finally start studying,but i guess it is going to remain only to my thoughts! I would rather complete my harry potter and the order of phoenix(for the 5th time i guess! :P)
Another question I am curious about is that why do people often tend to elude from reality? Is it because they are too ashamed to face it? Don't know....still wondering....:O
Anyway I'm also proud of one of my bestest buddy(i know i know theres no word like bestest :D) They created and entire new game and those guys are gonna make it free for everyone! They definitely exemplify talent with generosity! Love u josh! :)
Anyway even after 2 cups of tea my head is still aching badly! So i'm gonna go and relax! And keep my fingers crossed for India! Go india Go!!

Love-Rina :)

My 3rd post in a day!

Well, see i'm back yet once again. But this time its for a purpose
Today is some day i must say.The day i start blogging Japan gets hit by one of the largest earthquakes recorded in history of magnitude 8.9!! followed by a massive tsunami!!
This surely is a date to remember. Today also turns out to be one my friends birthday and the birthday of Sir sayajirao gaekwad! The great personality and ex-maharaja of Baroda(1875-1939)(thats a piece of info)
Sarcastic isn't it??
All I have to say is please please pray for the people facing this adverse crisis! That is the least we can do!

Something I came across whilst surfing,which I am sure many of us can relate to

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back. 

Finally blogging!

Well, 11/03/2011....what a day!
Waking up in the morning it seemed like yet another perfectly normal a.k.a boring day! But today it was that a realization happened in my mostly dumb and sleepy head. I was sitting at my college dome,waiting for a few friends to come over, when I thought "Why am I here?" It has been 19 long years since I came into this world and 2 long years in techo and it seems like ages since I have been sitting at the dome or nescafe or koko(i hope its spelled correctly :P).
To be honest, I am not sure whether this place has brought a positive or negative change in me. But it definitely has brought a transition. I'm no more the studious girl I used to be. It has taught me how to take the worst kind of jokes on myself,something i used to find very difficult to digest. It has given me many many acquaintances, a few friends, and a whole lot of disguised people to know. It has also given me "Footprints",the only part of my college life which I enjoy. Well for all of you who don't know what Footprints is-its a national level technical fiesta....hey wait a minute I'm not here to propagate it.
Recently my dearest di got married and that was when I realized my loneliness.Damn, I was so very dependent on her.And now, with people around talking about careers I feel so out of the place! I don't even know whom to turn on to for advice and why should I take advice from someone about what I should be doing the rest of my life?
So I decided to do something different,something new and something which would probably help me pour out my thoughts and give my sorted and more organized mind. But I definitely could not talk about it to anyone or else people would probably become sure about my craziness which they often gossip about.
Hence,I thought what better way than penning it down in a diary!! You know the ones they write about in novels.(PS-I am addicted to reading books except the ones related to engineering) and then something inside me told me "Nah, grow up, you're not even a teenager anymore". My bad :( :(
But then its a world of technology and not to forget "Blogging". So here I am with my very first post in my very own blog(something I can finally call my own and not be afraid of it hurting me or ditching me for some other blog,unless a virus enters ofcourse!! See there are pros and cons even in blogging!!God save us)
So if anyone has really bothered and taken the pains to read this awfully long note and has survived till the end of it, well thank you very much. And for the rest of them who haven't well God has definitely blessed by saving you the trouble!
So, I'm gonna go and have my afternoon nap,something I have been missing out since long.
Take care people and don't forget to live in the struggle for "survival of the fittest". :) :)
As bryan adams puts it
"On a day like today,the whole world could change.."
Love-Rina